13.11.10
can you take me back where i've been, boy, can you take me back?
excuse #758828278932 not to write this essay: eatin' peas.
12.11.10
this is small town music, this is big town music
excuse #758828278925 not to write this essay: feels a little degrading to second wave feminism for unqualified me to assess it's achievements in 2000. especially as i'm doing so badly so far. sorry sisters, for not doing you justice in this essay in particular and generally in life.
10.11.10
you were the fugitive but you don't know what you're running from
do you remember being 15 and staring down a certain persons user name on msn, desperate for them to initiate a conversation (or convo, as we called them) because if you did it of course they'd instantly realise that you were interested.
i thought i'd outgrown it.
and sure, facebook's changed the game a bit. now you can pretend to be fascinated by your newsfeed while keeping the "friends on chat" profile pic grid firmly in your periphery. but no. i'll always be that girl, despite the almost complete reversal in the particulars. i'm even listening to the same music i used to. and, tellingly, writing angsty blog entries. what a reversion. and it's self-fulfilling because the more i get like this, the more i hate myself and the less i can believe that anyone could be happy for me to start fb chatting with them. and the more i hope that they'll start fb chatting with me.
i thought i'd outgrown it.
and sure, facebook's changed the game a bit. now you can pretend to be fascinated by your newsfeed while keeping the "friends on chat" profile pic grid firmly in your periphery. but no. i'll always be that girl, despite the almost complete reversal in the particulars. i'm even listening to the same music i used to. and, tellingly, writing angsty blog entries. what a reversion. and it's self-fulfilling because the more i get like this, the more i hate myself and the less i can believe that anyone could be happy for me to start fb chatting with them. and the more i hope that they'll start fb chatting with me.
21.5.10
alone we stand, together we fall apart
on wednesday afternoon i was on the bus home. i have a funny relationship with wednesdays, my hardest two tutes are on wednesdays and though i usually end up enjoying them, i always get nervous and intimidated beforehand, because i never feel properly prepared and most of the other students seem to really know what they're talking about. but that wednesday had turned out pretty well. i hadn't failed the assignment i'd been so stressed about (i done rather well, in fact) and nothing else was due for a while. i was flicking through my ipod, trying to work out what i wanted to listen to. nirvana was too heavy, kate nash too perky, laura marling too deep and crystal castles too processed. i somewhat randomly settled on the strokes and they were perfect. definitely rock, but not too hard, intelligent but not too complicated. and they build up the perfect feeling of euphoria, they seem to propel you along with them. it'd been a while since i'd listened to them, and i wondered if they had anything new out, or if they were even still together, thinking how great they'd be live. then five minutes ago i finally looked at the "on the bright side" festival's facebook page which people had been liking all week. it's a perth sideshow of splendour in the grass. it's the day before i leave perth to go back to adelaide. it's all ages, so my underage sister/musical twin can come. and the strokes are headlining. this almost makes up for florence and the machine playing my hometown on my birthday, two weeks after i leave it to come back to adelaide.
24.4.10
come back to me, no need to hide
i just need to have a little rant about lily allen and all the shit being chucked around re: will-she-won't-she-retire. i mean, fucks sake.
to start with, let me just say, yes i am a fan, so i am undoubtedly biased. but i still think that people tend to forget that she's an actual real person. it seems to me that she has several reasons to retire, all of them perfectly acceptable.
-she's constantly hounded and criticised in the press and online about her talent (or rather her supposed lack thereof), appearance and personal life. especially in the light of some personal tragedies in the last few years (which, believe it or not, fame and money don't immune you from), wanting to move away from the thing that brought her all this attention is a pretty reasonable reaction.
-after all these attacks she might not be feeling very confident in her abilities as a performer.
-she got into this pretty young, and she might have just found it isn't what she wants to do forever.
i don't know which of these, if any, have any truth in them but it just seems utterly ludicrous that people are making such a big deal out of this (yeah, i know, i'm a hypocrite). would you be bitching if this was someone you know talking about leaving their job?
as for her pushing back her retirement plans, if you had the chance to play with someone of the musical calibre of jay-z, would you say no?
in summary of that jumble of indignation, leave her alone, she's probably having enough trouble with this decision anyway. and for the record, although she should do what makes her happy, i really hope she doesn't retire, at least not permanently, because i'd love to seen her play live again.
and while i'm on a roll, what the fuck is with this nrl bullshit all over the news? "rugby club fudges books" is headlining every news bulletin, for christs sake. it's getting more attention than when they gang-raped that poor woman! what is it about fucking rugby? it's just a stupid game. how many iraqi civilians were killed today? perspective, people. once again, hypocrite.
to start with, let me just say, yes i am a fan, so i am undoubtedly biased. but i still think that people tend to forget that she's an actual real person. it seems to me that she has several reasons to retire, all of them perfectly acceptable.
-she's constantly hounded and criticised in the press and online about her talent (or rather her supposed lack thereof), appearance and personal life. especially in the light of some personal tragedies in the last few years (which, believe it or not, fame and money don't immune you from), wanting to move away from the thing that brought her all this attention is a pretty reasonable reaction.
-after all these attacks she might not be feeling very confident in her abilities as a performer.
-she got into this pretty young, and she might have just found it isn't what she wants to do forever.
i don't know which of these, if any, have any truth in them but it just seems utterly ludicrous that people are making such a big deal out of this (yeah, i know, i'm a hypocrite). would you be bitching if this was someone you know talking about leaving their job?
as for her pushing back her retirement plans, if you had the chance to play with someone of the musical calibre of jay-z, would you say no?
in summary of that jumble of indignation, leave her alone, she's probably having enough trouble with this decision anyway. and for the record, although she should do what makes her happy, i really hope she doesn't retire, at least not permanently, because i'd love to seen her play live again.
and while i'm on a roll, what the fuck is with this nrl bullshit all over the news? "rugby club fudges books" is headlining every news bulletin, for christs sake. it's getting more attention than when they gang-raped that poor woman! what is it about fucking rugby? it's just a stupid game. how many iraqi civilians were killed today? perspective, people. once again, hypocrite.
7.4.10
i speak because i can
an old entry on belle de jour's infamous blog has inspired me to fire this old thing up after my unintentional hiatus of eight months... lucky i have no regular readership.
belle was discussing anonymity amongst female writers in response to a columnists claim that not using your own name was somehow anti-feminist.
it's an interesting point. i hadn't really thought about it but the female writers use of a nom de plume is a long and noble tradition, dating back even further than george eliot and the bronte/bells. In fact, there's really no way of knowing how many ancient authors were actually females in disguise. before the days of paparazzi, identity theft and the internet it would be pretty easy to get away with it. but as to why it's done...
originally, of course, it was because women had trouble getting published, or being taken seriously as writers. nowadays, however, in the "post-feminist" age, are nom de plumes used to disassociate oneself with potentially controversial ideas? or to avoid fame? perhaps the question should be why men are more likely to publish under their real name. might it not just be a matter of the stereotypical "male ego"? or a way to pick up...
belle was discussing anonymity amongst female writers in response to a columnists claim that not using your own name was somehow anti-feminist.
it's an interesting point. i hadn't really thought about it but the female writers use of a nom de plume is a long and noble tradition, dating back even further than george eliot and the bronte/bells. In fact, there's really no way of knowing how many ancient authors were actually females in disguise. before the days of paparazzi, identity theft and the internet it would be pretty easy to get away with it. but as to why it's done...
originally, of course, it was because women had trouble getting published, or being taken seriously as writers. nowadays, however, in the "post-feminist" age, are nom de plumes used to disassociate oneself with potentially controversial ideas? or to avoid fame? perhaps the question should be why men are more likely to publish under their real name. might it not just be a matter of the stereotypical "male ego"? or a way to pick up...
18.8.09
felt it in my fists, in my feet, in the hollows of my eyelids
so i turned 18 a week and a day ago. i had a little sleepover and we watched twilight and wolf creek, which i've been wanting to watch for a while. it was a sort of revelation to autralian cinema and the horror genre.
the effect it's had on me is two-fold. i've reverted to the age of ten in that a) the crush i had on nathan phillips when he was in the saddle club is well and truly rekindled and b) i can no longer sleep without all my stuffed animals in my bed.
the effect it's had on me is two-fold. i've reverted to the age of ten in that a) the crush i had on nathan phillips when he was in the saddle club is well and truly rekindled and b) i can no longer sleep without all my stuffed animals in my bed.
5.7.09
4.6.09
and somethings are too painful to say outloud
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ho69_sCkwyI
and the arctic monkeys announce their 3rd album. that's why life is always good.
16.5.09
'cause there's a red under my bed
god, i am so relieved. i actually thought day light savings would get a yes. and a greens mp in the lower house! what a day. however, i'm very much concerned about harry cunningham (aka tom ward)'s hair in the new series of silent witness. it's atrocious. and i'm concerned that he and nikki won't be together. they really can't drag it out any longer. though i do quite like emelia fox as a brunette...
19.4.09
happiness hit her like a bullet in the back
i had an epic sleepover with my sister and her friend last night.
we watched the it crowd, brokeback mountain, st trinians and angus thongs and perfect snogging.
we ate sour skittles, chocolate, tiny teddies and nutella.
we drank orange & mango juice and rockstar.
we played give take share, never have i ever, would you rather and bed wed dead.
we snuck out at 2 am to wander the streets and get our pyjamas wet.
we went to bed at 5 am.
then i woke up, beautified and went for a shop. purchased: 2x leggings, earrings, red top, black shoes, the dark knight, school of rock and crystal castles. i've been waiting for that to get in for ages.
we watched the it crowd, brokeback mountain, st trinians and angus thongs and perfect snogging.
we ate sour skittles, chocolate, tiny teddies and nutella.
we drank orange & mango juice and rockstar.
we played give take share, never have i ever, would you rather and bed wed dead.
we snuck out at 2 am to wander the streets and get our pyjamas wet.
we went to bed at 5 am.
then i woke up, beautified and went for a shop. purchased: 2x leggings, earrings, red top, black shoes, the dark knight, school of rock and crystal castles. i've been waiting for that to get in for ages.
18.4.09
then you make this noise and it's a apparent it's all over
i'm downloading google earth. it's cheaper than travel. i just hope my start up disk will stop whinging about how full it is...
4.4.09
i can't help but play around for sure, i did it before
i want a new series of silent witness, damn it! they totally left us hanging on the harry/nikki storyline. i'm pretty sure the last episode was when she was kidnapped by those extreme environmentalists. but it was kind of hard to portray the desperation in his search for her since all he could really do was slowly and methodically examine dead bodies and foot prints. it's not really a profession that's cut out for romance. never mind, it's easter soon and we're going down south. it'll be nice to have a proper break somewhere cold.
ps what's with everyone deleting their blogs?
ps what's with everyone deleting their blogs?
18.3.09
boy, someday you'll be a man
i broke my own rule about waiting until season 3 has finished before watching it and now i'm in the fucking waiting game again. at least i won't be so majorly spoiler'd all the time. though everything is so fucked up i can't believe it'll sort itself out before the end of the series. i'm hoping cook'll get hit by a bus, it did wonders for tony. and since i don't care what happens to him it'll undermine the cliff-hanger effect. jesus, tv actually does rule my life. can't wait for aleena's on saturday. i'm going to get fucked.
6.3.09
i've got nothing to lose with this request
so, whoops, i've dyed my hair red. it wasn't really accidental but i didn't really think it through. oh well, it looks ok. and i've got a bit more work, invigilating exams for dad two days next week. $15 an hour for dobbing on someone if they cheat. better than babysitting.
4.3.09
is your sweater on?
this is a facebook meme but whatever.
So the way this one works, you pick a band and then use all of their song titles to answer the following questions about yourself.
Pick a band/artist: mystery jets
1. Are you a male or female?: alas agnes?
2. Describe yourself: diamond in the dark
3. How do you feel about your place in life?: veiled in grey
4. Describe your job: umbrellahead
5. Describe your spouse/significant other: behind the bunhouse
6. Describe your current location: hideaway
7. Describe where you want to be: two doors down
8. Your best friend is: first to know
9. Your favorite color is: purple prose
10. You know that the future will be: soluble in air
11. What’s the weather like today?: ageless
12. If your life was a television show what would it be called?: lizzie's lion
13. What is the meaning of life?: young love
14. What is the best advice you have to give?: hand me down
15. If you could change your name what would you change it to?: mj
So the way this one works, you pick a band and then use all of their song titles to answer the following questions about yourself.
Pick a band/artist: mystery jets
1. Are you a male or female?: alas agnes?
2. Describe yourself: diamond in the dark
3. How do you feel about your place in life?: veiled in grey
4. Describe your job: umbrellahead
5. Describe your spouse/significant other: behind the bunhouse
6. Describe your current location: hideaway
7. Describe where you want to be: two doors down
8. Your best friend is: first to know
9. Your favorite color is: purple prose
10. You know that the future will be: soluble in air
11. What’s the weather like today?: ageless
12. If your life was a television show what would it be called?: lizzie's lion
13. What is the meaning of life?: young love
14. What is the best advice you have to give?: hand me down
15. If you could change your name what would you change it to?: mj
1.3.09
all the way from france
is it illegal to buy r rated movies if you're under 18? cause i totally pulled it off today.
20.2.09
i've got mascara running through my bloodstream
(TEN) Random Things About Me
1. i did this meme from the bottom up
2. i hate changing sheets
3. i haven't read twilight
4. i don't like roses
5. i have a mini mirror ball in my room
6. i was born at home
7. my shoes are size 10
8. i like high school musical
9. i'm racist about canadians, eh
10. i lie about my height
(NINE) Places I've Visited
1. rotto
2. adelaide
3. malaysia
4. u.a.e
5. slovenia
6. hungary
7. france
8. italy
9. new zealand
(EIGHT) Things I want to do before I die
1. learn to drive
2. go to oxford
3. find something that i like to do
4. get a tattoo
5. have more shoes than i need
6. learn to dance
7. get a yorkie
8. be successful
(SEVEN) of My Fave Items In my bedroom
1. grandma's old jewelry
2. the pictures jot drew for me
3. the pictures my cousins drew for me
4. all my tour momentos
5. my books
6. my shoe signed by the mystery jets
7. my laptop
(SIX) Things I'm Afraid Of
1. dementors
2. wolves
3. mice
4. public speaking
5. terminal illnesses
6. missing tv shows
(FIVE) Ways to Win My Heart
1. have good hair
2. openly enjoy musical theatre
3. m&ms?
4. like food with lots of food colouring
5. appreciate television
(FOUR) Things I believe In
1. freedoms
2. the power of persuasion
3. trees
4. coincidence
(THREE) Things I do everyday
1. watch tv
2. eat
3. sleep
(TWO) Things I'm trying not to do right now
1. misspell anything
2. go to bed too late
(One) Person I want to see right now
1. tama
1. i did this meme from the bottom up
2. i hate changing sheets
3. i haven't read twilight
4. i don't like roses
5. i have a mini mirror ball in my room
6. i was born at home
7. my shoes are size 10
8. i like high school musical
9. i'm racist about canadians, eh
10. i lie about my height
(NINE) Places I've Visited
1. rotto
2. adelaide
3. malaysia
4. u.a.e
5. slovenia
6. hungary
7. france
8. italy
9. new zealand
(EIGHT) Things I want to do before I die
1. learn to drive
2. go to oxford
3. find something that i like to do
4. get a tattoo
5. have more shoes than i need
6. learn to dance
7. get a yorkie
8. be successful
(SEVEN) of My Fave Items In my bedroom
1. grandma's old jewelry
2. the pictures jot drew for me
3. the pictures my cousins drew for me
4. all my tour momentos
5. my books
6. my shoe signed by the mystery jets
7. my laptop
(SIX) Things I'm Afraid Of
1. dementors
2. wolves
3. mice
4. public speaking
5. terminal illnesses
6. missing tv shows
(FIVE) Ways to Win My Heart
1. have good hair
2. openly enjoy musical theatre
3. m&ms?
4. like food with lots of food colouring
5. appreciate television
(FOUR) Things I believe In
1. freedoms
2. the power of persuasion
3. trees
4. coincidence
(THREE) Things I do everyday
1. watch tv
2. eat
3. sleep
(TWO) Things I'm trying not to do right now
1. misspell anything
2. go to bed too late
(One) Person I want to see right now
1. tama
where do all the lovers meet with one another?
3 years on.
10 things currently on your desk
01. macbook
02. 2 visual diaries
03. it's not me, it's you - lily allen
04. a black top
05. a green sponge
06. a dirt cheap cds bag
07. 5 white board markers
08. a black pen
09. last years history fashcards
10. the signed insert from twentyone - mystery jets
9 favourite ships/couples
01. sid/cassie
02. ron/hermione
03. chuck/blair
04. britney/justin
05. jal/chris
06. georgia nicholson/dave the laugh
07. navid/adrianna
08. katara/sukko
09. house/cuddy
8 of your current favourite songs
01. six queens - larrikin love
02. can't stop feeling - franz ferdinand
03. hideaway - mystery jets
04. hell is around the corner - portishead and tricky
05. shout me out - tv on the radio
06. lovers who uncover - crystal castles
07. ulysses - franz ferdinand
08. crosswords - mystery jets
7 people you talk to most
01. steph
02. anna
03. aleena
04. chelse
05. sarah
06. michelle
07. jot
6 favourite kinds of candy/chocolate
01. m&ms
02. daim
03. chocolate fudge poptarts
04. coles belgian milk chocolate
05. boost
06. skittles
4 favorite bands and ONE artist
01. mystery jets
02. jamie t
03. larrikin love
04. late of the pier
05. franz ferdinand
4 websites you visit daily
01. twitter
02. facebook
03. myspace
04. blogger
3 items on your wall
01. whiteboard
02. 2 corkboards
03. a blue post-it
2 favourite sayings
01. gay
02. knickers
1 favourite movie
01. billy elliot
10 things currently on your desk
01. macbook
02. 2 visual diaries
03. it's not me, it's you - lily allen
04. a black top
05. a green sponge
06. a dirt cheap cds bag
07. 5 white board markers
08. a black pen
09. last years history fashcards
10. the signed insert from twentyone - mystery jets
9 favourite ships/couples
01. sid/cassie
02. ron/hermione
03. chuck/blair
04. britney/justin
05. jal/chris
06. georgia nicholson/dave the laugh
07. navid/adrianna
08. katara/sukko
09. house/cuddy
8 of your current favourite songs
01. six queens - larrikin love
02. can't stop feeling - franz ferdinand
03. hideaway - mystery jets
04. hell is around the corner - portishead and tricky
05. shout me out - tv on the radio
06. lovers who uncover - crystal castles
07. ulysses - franz ferdinand
08. crosswords - mystery jets
7 people you talk to most
01. steph
02. anna
03. aleena
04. chelse
05. sarah
06. michelle
07. jot
6 favourite kinds of candy/chocolate
01. m&ms
02. daim
03. chocolate fudge poptarts
04. coles belgian milk chocolate
05. boost
06. skittles
4 favorite bands and ONE artist
01. mystery jets
02. jamie t
03. larrikin love
04. late of the pier
05. franz ferdinand
4 websites you visit daily
01. twitter
02. facebook
03. myspace
04. blogger
3 items on your wall
01. whiteboard
02. 2 corkboards
03. a blue post-it
2 favourite sayings
01. gay
02. knickers
1 favourite movie
01. billy elliot
we take our fill, take our fill, take our fill
this is so pathetic. look how often i'm blogging! i need a life for fucks sake. instead i'm sitting at home, dreading work, reading entire books in a day and lamenting the fact that gossip girl and 90210 aren't coming back on until march. saddo.
in fact, the highlight of my week was bumping into steph and chelse. not so bad? it's really a highlight because it reassured me that, contrary to the events of my dream a few nights ago, chelse hasn't died in a freak yachting accident. if there were international awards for those least likely to yacht, she would have won it every year she's been alive. i'm actually insane.
and one last thing. why do i keep telling people that i'm going to uwa next year? it's a lie but as long as the possibility exists i should not speak of it. i'll jinx myself. note to self: it can never happen. don't let it.
in fact, the highlight of my week was bumping into steph and chelse. not so bad? it's really a highlight because it reassured me that, contrary to the events of my dream a few nights ago, chelse hasn't died in a freak yachting accident. if there were international awards for those least likely to yacht, she would have won it every year she's been alive. i'm actually insane.
and one last thing. why do i keep telling people that i'm going to uwa next year? it's a lie but as long as the possibility exists i should not speak of it. i'll jinx myself. note to self: it can never happen. don't let it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
